Losing Passion......

I can hardly feel there's any brain juice of mine within my brain. I keep losing passion on doing my assignment. Can't really see if there's any new ideas around to inspire me. The classes are just way too technical, none actually giv me the liberty to express my idea. Well, guess I'm being emo again. Bro going into a Japanese collage soon. Soon or late he will be able to work in one of those big ass company of games...... I really confused and keep wonder if I'll have the chance to do wat I want since the scholarship is binding me, tight...... Not to mention i hav to work for the school for three years. Ass hole!

I am confused and totally helpless. None actually understand my position and situation. I want to study in Canada but the tuition fee is just way too far from approachable. Not mention bro is entering a good school and all the money should go to him before me. I understand my family ability of supplying my education fee, but I am deeply depressed just to know that I will be going nowhere no matter how well I achieve. I guess I'm losing my guts and passion because of such issue. No point to work super hard since the result will be the same. I will still graduate in M'sia and get into work and that's all for my study......

I sometimes really get depressed why I'm stuck in M'sia while my brother get to go to Tokyo. But I know this should not be the issue for me to be envy of my brother. Now, I wish I at least get a happy study life in campus...... But, the distance between me and my friends is getting far. I kinda losing fate in my campus life now.